In a perfect world the call would have gone like this:



Me: Thank you for calling large insurance company, this is Cynthia may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I work for Ticketmaster and want to find a doctor that is on the plan?

Me: I can help you with that. Lets see....ah yes....I see we have several doctors on the plan in your area.

Caller: Great! How do I get that information?

Me: Well, you can put it on a major credit card or.....wait....you can ONLY put it on a major credit card as there is no other way to pay for the info.

Caller: PAY for the info?

Me: That is right. There is the charge for the info, plus a third of that cost is my locator fee and then there is another fee for mailing the info and a fee for finding an envelope and and a fee folding the list and putting it into the envelope....

Caller: Forget this...I am going to another insurance company

Me: Well, you employer only offers us for your health care needs so unfortunately we are the only game in town. Now....about payment?



Ok...you get the gist!