Frustration1

When I took this job last September, I thought I was the luckiest person on earth. I posted my resume on Monster, got a call from this company in a week, had the interview the next day and the job a few hours later! I thought it was going to be the job I always wanted, simular to the one I had at Health Net but in the always exciting world of Entertainment Technology. I couldn't believe it!

I finally feel like I am getting the hang of this job but this week has been a tough one. The boss is in Ireland and I am the one "in charge" sort of. Well, on top of little mistakes and things not getting done quick enough to peoples satisfaction, I found out that I have been sending out the wrong type of contract for months! Crap!

I know I am have a tendency to be too hard on myself but is that what this is? I have to keep in mind I have only been at this 4 months. I had two days, just two, to learn a job that is extremely detailed and while not complicated, a little difficult. I do not have a legal background and I am drafting contracts. I don't have a technological background but have to explain our Surround Sound Technology to potential licensees. But my boss, who was just promoted to director on her 30th birthday, must have seen something on my resume right? If that's the case than why am I magnifying every little mistake and gripe from my Market Managers to the point where I am losing sleep?

I think more than anything, I hate feeling stupid in any aspect of my life and worse, I don't like thinking other people think i'm an idiot. I know I am intellegent but this job isn't making me feel like it! Reviews are coming up, i'll see what happens then. But I don't like thinking that I am going to come in and get fired, which I am sure I won't, but I hate feeling like it!

I need a drink! Tequila shots anyone!

Here's To You, Mrs. Robinson!

You hear it all the time, especially after you hit 40. "Age is just a number" or "You are only as old as you feel". Is it really?

I was confronted with this question at the most unlikely but yet likely place, a bar! There I was in the bar, out to support my friends band, when suddenly I was surround by the breed known as "The Cougar". The Cougar, the cultural phenomenon of a older woman out for a much younger guy! Teased hair, shirts cut down to there with silicone to spare and that look in their eye. A little inebriated, out to have fun, they spotted their prey and went all out! Their target? The lucky guitarist was the man! Cute, talented, all of 24 years old! They were all over him like he was the last man on the planet. It didn't seem to be the first time for this experience on either side of the conquest! A cute, 24-year old guitarist, are you kidding me? A Cougars dream to be sure and all parties involved were workin it with all they had!

I found myself rolling my eyes! This is the stuff I tease my girlfriend about! She's been waiving her Cougar flag loud and proud for a couple of years! I didn't want any part of it! What would I have in common with a young guy? I am not a gamer or thin, hot blonde, two of the only things I thought the under 35 male was interested in. It dawned on me that those assumptions about the young guy are just as bad as someone assuming that I am dull and boring because I am over 40!

So, while the entertainment value in observing the guitar player and the Cougars was off the charts (bordering on voyerism, actually) it begs the question: Why the hell not? Who said we have to act our age in place of having fun? Who says having fun is immature, irresponsible? Because I believe that age is just a number, am I a cougar? Do I have to have a label? Why does having a personal connection with someone have to fit within an age bracket?

Look, I have never really hung out with guys my own age and most my friends are younger! It seems the 40+ guys are either married with kids or divorced with them. They have mortgages, bills, companies they own, responsibilities. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with a responsible guy of any age, one that has goals, is self-motivated, knows who he is! However, give me someone who has some of those qualities but with a carefree attitude! Someone who isn't weighted down with the weight of bad experiences! Someone who can be impulsive and still responsible! I don't want the dude sitting around, playing video games and watching pay-per-view in lieu of working. I want someone fun to hang with, who can still laugh at life, who is young enough not to be jaded or bitter.To this Cougar, that is the appeal of the younger guy! Well, that and it's been said they have stamina and energy to burn! All that Red Bull! :)

Before you flame me, I know that there are exceptions to every rule. Yes, I do know that there arguments to be made on both sides of this equation. I am just saying that it's worth exploring! Besides, it has been acceptable since the beginning of time for men to go for younger women.

With that in mind, I say sisters, go for it!! The double standard has to stop! If you are lucky to find a connection with anyone on any level, why let a little thing like age be a deal breaker just because society frowns on it? Lucky for us, Dr. Phil and Demi Moore have stamped the Cougar phenomenon with their approval so its more acceptable than ever! Cher has been in the Cougar Hall of Fame for decades! If younger guys, are your thing, follow their lead: Go for it!