Is It A Conspiracy Or Temporary Delay?

At first I thought God is working in my life because for the last couple of days I have been totally thinking of working on my online dating profile. I truly think I am ready to get out there because I am excited about getting online, eager to find someone fun to do things with, thrilled to think about sitting with someone of the opposite sex, laughing and sharing ideas, looking forward to great blog material and to maybe become the next Carrie Bradshaw.

This morning someone other than a devine being was at work against me. The brakes were temporarily put on my attempts to find ...I was going to say find "the perfect man" but since he doesn't exist I will use the generic find "someone". But I digress. Here I am at Panera Bakery on a lazy Sunday morning. I am sitting in my favorite booth, laptop plugged in, coffee in hand and I am ready to pimp my profile and get started. See, its already hot at home and I also work better where there are no distractions. The perfect atmosphere to get started, fix my profile and chat a bit. Guess what? The website is blocked! Apprarently Panera doesn't want to take a chance that you will be doing anything imoral or illegal so some websites are blocked. Great!

Normally I would welcome this delay in something I have been afraid to do. I would take this as a sign that I am headed down the wrong path and continue on doing what I am doing. But to borrow from Dr Phil, "what about this is working for you". The answer to that question in my case is nothing. Nothing about staying at home with the dogs is working for me. I am learning that you have to get out of the fear and see what you truly want.

I have full faith in God and that He doesn't want me to spend the rest of my life with my dogs, as wonderfully loving as they may be. Instead of being relived I can't access the dating site I am actually disappointed! I am disappointed I won't be finding interesting and funny men from all walks of life but comforted to know it's just a temporary delay. I will be home later this evening, on line, chatting and working on my profile, I promise! I can't wait!

From Rock And Roll To The Nerd Prom

The Washington Correspondence Dinner! Where the power elite meet Hollywood chic! I followed all the action on Twitter: there is Tom, Katie and Donna Brazile, DC pundent. Oh look....its Robert Gibbs, White House Press Secretary and Barbara Walters! Look over there it's.....nah....it can't be...OMG it is...WHAT IS JON BON JOVI DOING AT THE "NERD PROM"?!?! What am I doing following something called "the nerd prom"? What happened to parties, booze and rock and roll? What happened to youth?

Seeing Jon hob nobbing with the Washington wonks instead of groupies made me think back to when we first "met". It was the fall of 1986. I had just moved into my first apartment and was struggling with becoming an adult. It was scary and exhilarating but one thing puzzled me: how can I do this growing up crap and still have fun! I don't want to let go of the fun! Enter "Slippery When Wet"!

"Slippery When Wet", Bon Jovi's 3rd album, infused a spirit of Jersey Shore fun into my crazy life. It was a spirit of anything goes, of parties, of fun! And fun I did have! Fun with the traveling to see the band all over the country, fun with the new friends I made, fun with sneaking in to radio stations to meet them! Following Bon Jovi became so addicting and so fun that responsibility went by the wayside. Money for bills was spent on concert tickets, jobs were put in jeopardy by time spent traveling instead of working, life became all about the fun!

Then I grew up...we ALL grew up...mortals and rock stars alike. I knew I had finally hit adulthood when I missed the last Jovi tour because I couldn't afford it! I didn't travel to see them in New York, I didn't even see them in downtown LA! I knew Jon Bon Jovi hit itwhen I saw him on Oprah after the inaguration, talking about social responsibility and his philanthropy efforts! It seems we have both learned a thing about balance!

This balance doesn't mean I give up my love of Bon Jovi, no way! Those trips to NY are amazing. Now, as an adult, I budget for them and plan for them. And I can follow rock bands and Nerd Prom attendees in equal measure! During the journey to adulthood I have learned I don't have to give up fun along the way, I just need to keep it in check. Like an adult.

From Rock And Roll To The Nerd Prom

The Washington Correspondence Dinner! Where the power elite meet Hollywood chic! I followed all the action on Twitter: there is Tom, Katie and Donna Brazile, DC pundent. Oh look....its Robert Gibbs, White House Press Secretary and Barbara Walters! Look over there it's.....nah....it can't be...OMG it is...WHAT IS JON BON JOVI DOING AT THE "NERD PROM"?!?! What am I doing following something called "the nerd prom"? What happened to parties, booze and rock and roll? What happened to youth?

Seeing Jon hob nobbing with the Washington wonks instead of groupies made me think back to when we first "met". It was the fall of 1986. I had just moved into my first apartment and was struggling with becoming an adult. It was scary and exhilarating but one thing puzzled me: how can I do this growing up crap and still have fun! I don't want to let go of the fun! Enter "Slippery When Wet"!

"Slippery When Wet", Bon Jovi's 3rd album, infused a spirit of Jersey Shore fun into my crazy life. It was a spirit of anything goes, of parties, of fun! And fun I did have! Fun with the traveling to see the band all over the country, fun with the new friends I made, fun with sneaking in to radio stations to meet them! Following Bon Jovi became so addicting and so fun that responsibility went by the wayside. Money for bills was spent on concert tickets, jobs were put in jeopardy by time spent traveling instead of working, life became all about the fun!

Then I grew up...we ALL grew up...mortals and rock stars alike. I knew I had finally hit adulthood when I missed the last Jovi tour because I couldn't afford it! I didn't travel to see them in New York, I didn't even see them in downtown LA! I knew Jon Bon Jovi hit itwhen I saw him on Oprah after the inaguration, talking about social responsibility and his philanthropy efforts! It seems we have both learned a thing about balance!

This balance doesn't mean I give up my love of Bon Jovi, no way! Those trips to NY are amazing. Now, as an adult, I budget for them and plan for them. And I can follow rock bands and Nerd Prom attendees in equal measure! During the journey to adulthood I have learned I don't have to give up fun along the way, I just need to keep it in check. Like an adult.

Another Friday Night

Ok...I am just going to say it: I am desperate and dateless. I am spending another weekend without male company. I am working, hanging out with dear and wonderful girlfriends, relaxing in the safe and loving company of my joyful dogs. But not dating. That my friends has got to change.

I had an ephiphany lately: I have been hiding behind my weight. Hiding because of the fear of rejection and even more strong, the fear of NOT being rejected. Getting close to someone is scary! I slowly started to think about this after the Mayercraft cruise. There we were on deck, Saturday Night and about 15 guys in bathrobes come up and want to party with us! All kinds of guys! Your first reaction may have been "sweet merciful God, Hallelujah". Mine was to run like Hell into the girls room out of fear! Talk about an Ah Ha moment! It was then I realized that my lack of male companionship has nothing to do with my weight. The weight isn't the issue, the issue is me!

Here's the thing: If I just don't get over this I will be looking back at my life and realize I have never had the joy of living with someone who can't seem to put the seat down or his socks in the hamper. I will have lived without the experience of having a partner, someone who can appreciate me for who I am and share this experience we call life. And lets face it, a little pleasure every once in awhile from someone that isn't battery operated wouldn't be such a bad thing either!

So I have signed up on the dating website and it has been a learning experience! I put my pic up there and I get hits. Guys are interested! So what people have been telling me is true: there are guys out there that like the bigger women! Hurray! My friend has had success on the same site and she is willing to help me so I am going to take advantage of that! Revise my profile...start chatting...I swear ....this weekend! Guys aren't going to walk in my living room and ask what time Greys Anatomy is on, no they aren't! I am going to have to make an effort to get out there and just do this! Date...meet men..find someone! I am going to turn into a dating machine! If anything I will change the names to protect the guilty and turn it into great material for the blog.

Stay tuned...this is going to get interesting!

:)

Another Friday Night

Ok...I am just going to say it: I am desperate and dateless. I am spending another weekend without male company. I am working, hanging out with dear and wonderful girlfriends, relaxing in the safe and loving company of my joyful dogs. But not dating. That my friends has got to change.

I had an ephiphany lately: I have been hiding behind my weight. Hiding because of the fear of rejection and even more strong, the fear of NOT being rejected. Getting close to someone is scary! I slowly started to think about this after the Mayercraft cruise. There we were on deck, Saturday Night and about 15 guys in bathrobes come up and want to party with us! All kinds of guys! Your first reaction may have been "sweet merciful God, Hallelujah". Mine was to run like Hell into the girls room out of fear! Talk about an Ah Ha moment! It was then I realized that my lack of male companionship has nothing to do with my weight. The weight isn't the issue, the issue is me!

Here's the thing: If I just don't get over this I will be looking back at my life and realize I have never had the joy of living with someone who can't seem to put the seat down or his socks in the hamper. I will have lived without the experience of having a partner, someone who can appreciate me for who I am and share this experience we call life. And lets face it, a little pleasure every once in awhile from someone that isn't battery operated wouldn't be such a bad thing either!

So I have signed up on the dating website and it has been a learning experience! I put my pic up there and I get hits. Guys are interested! So what people have been telling me is true: there are guys out there that like the bigger women! Hurray! My friend has had success on the same site and she is willing to help me so I am going to take advantage of that! Revise my profile...start chatting...I swear ....this weekend! Guys aren't going to walk in my living room and ask what time Greys Anatomy is on, no they aren't! I am going to have to make an effort to get out there and just do this! Date...meet men..find someone! I am going to turn into a dating machine! If anything I will change the names to protect the guilty and turn it into great material for the blog.

Stay tuned...this is going to get interesting!

:)

Happy New Magazine Day

I love Thursday! Not because Grey's Anatomy is on and not because it is one day away from the weekend. No, I love Thursday because it is new magazine day! All the new magazines hit my favorite newstand and to me it's like Christmas!

I love magazines because I am a communication and information junkie! The need to know and know ASAP is in my DNA. I am a female, I am a Gemini. Knowing and then telling everyone the details, it's who I am.

I love the quick information that weekly magazines give. I don't have to read through the slow parts of a 300 page novel to find out if Brad gets the girl in the end. It will be in a blurb in US Weekly and at my newsstand on Thursday.
Magazines help me keep in touch with my current celebrity crush! I can learn all about my crush on my own, in my jammies! Just me, my crush and US Weekly, OK and People! I find out his likes, dislikes, how he is "just like us" and who he is...isn't...is dating. All the info I need and don't need right there on Thursday!

I love the visual medium that is magazines! I love the colors, the fonts, the graphics! Each of my favorite monthly magazines has a distinct layout that is colorful and gourgeous! I didn't find out that I was a visual person until I started salivating when I picked up the new issue of "Rachael Ray Everyday".

I love new magazine day. Magazines are definately one of my more expensive addictions to be sure. But looking forward to Thursday gets me through the week and I am ok with that for now.

Happy New Magazine Day

I love Thursday! Not because Grey's Anatomy is on and not because it is one day away from the weekend. No, I love Thursday because it is new magazine day! All the new magazines hit my favorite newstand and to me it's like Christmas!

I love magazines because I am a communication and information junkie! The need to know and know ASAP is in my DNA. I am a female, I am a Gemini. Knowing and then telling everyone the details, it's who I am.

I love the quick information that weekly magazines give. I don't have to read through the slow parts of a 300 page novel to find out if Brad gets the girl in the end. It will be in a blurb in US Weekly and at my newsstand on Thursday.
Magazines help me keep in touch with my current celebrity crush! I can learn all about my crush on my own, in my jammies! Just me, my crush and US Weekly, OK and People! I find out his likes, dislikes, how he is "just like us" and who he is...isn't...is dating. All the info I need and don't need right there on Thursday!

I love the visual medium that is magazines! I love the colors, the fonts, the graphics! Each of my favorite monthly magazines has a distinct layout that is colorful and gourgeous! I didn't find out that I was a visual person until I started salivating when I picked up the new issue of "Rachael Ray Everyday".

I love new magazine day. Magazines are definately one of my more expensive addictions to be sure. But looking forward to Thursday gets me through the week and I am ok with that for now.

Dear Miss California

Dear Miss Ca,

Bravo on your Oscar worthy performance yesterday at the "press conference"( or as those of us who know better call it, the "staged media event"). Tears...invoking the military...standing behind the Constitution...I am surprised you left the red, white and blue bikini at home! Didn't master manipulator Donald Trump tell you to bring it?

I hope yesterdays boohaha brings you exactly the career you are looking for: acting, modeling, reality TV star. I do. Go out and follow your bliss because representing California really isn't your thing, is it?

Are you really thinking of California? Nah! I think your own agenda took over right at the time you aligned yourself with a marriage protection group that had a bigger PR department than you. I think you parted ways with the state when you made the talk show rounds to further YOUR agenda, not ours!

You represent California, the state that has the highest divorce rate in the nation! How about finding a way to bring that number down as a way to protect marriage instead of aligning yourself with a group that use "marriage protection" to disguise bigotry? Nahh....finding ways to truly keep the family alive won't land you on Larry King or get you that book deal, will it?

By the way, did I hear you whining about rights yesterday? Did I misunderstand or were you "crying" about your right to free speech being violated? Hmmm..rights being violated...isn't this the topic that brought you to this career opportunity...I mean...mess...in the first place? Apparently The Donald isn't teaching you about karma or irony, is he?

Quite honestly, I wish you would just go away and leave Californians to worry about things like wildfires destroying pristine beach areas, the budget crisis, lay offs in the largest school district in the nation and double digit unemployment. Since the odds of you disappearing are slim to none, do your fellow Californians a favour: take the reality show deal. It will give us something to take our minds off worrying about things that really matter!

Love and peace,
Cynthia

Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

Dear Miss California

Dear Miss Ca,

Bravo on your Oscar worthy performance yesterday at the "press conference"( or as those of us who know better call it, the "staged media event"). Tears...invoking the military...standing behind the Constitution...I am surprised you left the red, white and blue bikini at home! Didn't master manipulator Donald Trump tell you to bring it?

I hope yesterdays boohaha brings you exactly the career you are looking for: acting, modeling, reality TV star. I do. Go out and follow your bliss because representing California really isn't your thing, is it?

Are you really thinking of California? Nah! I think your own agenda took over right at the time you aligned yourself with a marriage protection group that had a bigger PR department than you. I think you parted ways with the state when you made the talk show rounds to further YOUR agenda, not ours!

You represent California, the state that has the highest divorce rate in the nation! How about finding a way to bring that number down as a way to protect marriage instead of aligning yourself with a group that use "marriage protection" to disguise bigotry? Nahh....finding ways to truly keep the family alive won't land you on Larry King or get you that book deal, will it?

By the way, did I hear you whining about rights yesterday? Did I misunderstand or were you "crying" about your right to free speech being violated? Hmmm..rights being violated...isn't this the topic that brought you to this career opportunity...I mean...mess...in the first place? Apparently The Donald isn't teaching you about karma or irony, is he?

Quite honestly, I wish you would just go away and leave Californians to worry about things like wildfires destroying pristine beach areas, the budget crisis, lay offs in the largest school district in the nation and double digit unemployment. Since the odds of you disappearing are slim to none, do your fellow Californians a favour: take the reality show deal. It will give us something to take our minds off worrying about things that really matter!

Love and peace,
Cynthia
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

Fibromyalgia Awareness Day

Today is Fibromyalgia Awareness Day. While I am not suffering from symptoms, I am affected. One of the sweetest, smartest and most wonderful people I know, my fellow blogger and BFF Selena is a Fibromyalgia sufferer!

She deals with so many things and I think it's the lack of energy and living in constant pain that gets to her. But she is amazing! She deals with it the best she can by, among other things "Finding a balance between being open to trying new things to treat my health problems and living within a budget; setting up trial periods to evaluate if something is working and stopping if I am not getting any benefits"

She is an inspiration to be sure and she is living with a disease that isn't easily recognized by society or even the medical community. That needs to change. Read on below to pledge your support. For more about what living with "Fibro" is about, read Selena's blog at ohmyachesandpains.blogspot.com.

TAKE THE PLEDGE:


Family & Friends: Pledge to Care About Fibromyalgia



This is the pledge that family and friends of people living with fibromyalgia are encouraged to take at the National Fibromyalgia Association website.


We pledge to:

ALWAYS STAND BESIDE LOVED ONES with fibromyalgia, and support the patients’ quest for a better quality of life.

ACT AS AN ADVOCATE to insure that loved ones receive the best possible medical care.

BE RESPECTFUL OF LOVED ONES’ PHYSICAL LIMITATIONS, and help—or get help—when it is needed.

EDUCATE OTHERS about fibromyalgia and encourage them to provide people with fibromyalgia with support and understanding.

ADVOCATE for improved treatments, expanded research and an increased awareness and acceptance of fibromyalgia.

UNCONDITIONALLY LOVE the people in my life who have fibromyalgia.

>>> Are you ready to take the pledge?

Go to: www.fmaware.org to take the PLEDGE TO CARE and to find out more info about this disease. When you take the Pledge to Care about people living with Fibromyalgia. Your first initial, last name and state will appear at the NFA "WE CARE" web page, along with the first inital and last name of any person you wish to honor.

Fibromyalgia Awareness Day

Today is Fibromyalgia Awareness Day. While I am not suffering from symptoms, I am affected. One of the sweetest, smartest and most wonderful people I know, my fellow blogger and BFF Selena is a Fibromyalgia sufferer!

She deals with so many things and I think it's the lack of energy and living in constant pain that gets to her. But she is amazing! She deals with it the best she can by, among other things "Finding a balance between being open to trying new things to treat my health problems and living within a budget; setting up trial periods to evaluate if something is working and stopping if I am not getting any benefits"

She is an inspiration to be sure and she is living with a disease that isn't easily recognized by society or even the medical community. That needs to change. Read on below to pledge your support. For more about what living with "Fibro" is about, read Selena's blog at ohmyachesandpains.blogspot.com.

TAKE THE PLEDGE:


Family & Friends: Pledge to Care About Fibromyalgia



This is the pledge that family and friends of people living with fibromyalgia are encouraged to take at the National Fibromyalgia Association website.


We pledge to:

ALWAYS STAND BESIDE LOVED ONES with fibromyalgia, and support the patients’ quest for a better quality of life.

ACT AS AN ADVOCATE to insure that loved ones receive the best possible medical care.

BE RESPECTFUL OF LOVED ONES’ PHYSICAL LIMITATIONS, and help—or get help—when it is needed.

EDUCATE OTHERS about fibromyalgia and encourage them to provide people with fibromyalgia with support and understanding.

ADVOCATE for improved treatments, expanded research and an increased awareness and acceptance of fibromyalgia.

UNCONDITIONALLY LOVE the people in my life who have fibromyalgia.

>>> Are you ready to take the pledge?

Go to: www.fmaware.org to take the PLEDGE TO CARE and to find out more info about this disease. When you take the Pledge to Care about people living with Fibromyalgia. Your first initial, last name and state will appear at the NFA "WE CARE" web page, along with the first inital and last name of any person you wish to honor.

Time Vs. Priorities

There is a phrase I use rather indiscriminately. I use it when its true but more often when it's not. I use it more for a cop out than to use it to tell someone legitimate information about my day. I suspect I am not alone. The phrase? "I don't have time".

There are those that truly don't have time. There are women who work full time at a job and go home to their 2nd job as wife and/or mother. There are those that are working more than one job to make ends meet and even some that work multiple jobs and then go to school to further their education.

I am none of those. I am single with no kids and two jobs but one is weekends only and the hours are sporatic. Essentially, my time and money is all my own. What I realized in my ephiany is that my problem isn't with time itself but with priorities. When I say "I don't have time" what I really should be saying is "I don't want to make time". I have time to excersise but rather be online. I have time to volunteer but rather be at the beach. For me it isn't about finding the time, but choosing how to fill the abundance of time I have.

Some of you reading this today are probably thinking "ah ha! That's why I don't hear from her" or "Sheesh...that's why she flaked on me last weekend". Absolutely! It's because I may have not made the best choice in how to fill time. This is why I am using this public forum to declare my attempt to make better choices starting with time verses priority. There are volunteer opportunities and chances to reconnect with those I love that I am missing out on. I just hope TiVo will remember me when I come back to reconnect with him (Yes....my TiVo is a him....so was Samantha's on "Sex And The City"....my name is Cyndie and I am a TV Addict..but that's another blog for later).

I may be blessed with time but we are all blessed with having free will and the ability to choose. How will you choose to spend your time today? I am going to the gym....right after I finish last weeks "24"! What can I say, change is a work in progress!

:)

Time Vs. Priorities

There is a phrase I use rather indiscriminately. I use it when its true but more often when it's not. I use it more for a cop out than to use it to tell someone legitimate information about my day. I suspect I am not alone. The phrase? "I don't have time".

There are those that truly don't have time. There are women who work full time at a job and go home to their 2nd job as wife and/or mother. There are those that are working more than one job to make ends meet and even some that work multiple jobs and then go to school to further their education.

I am none of those. I am single with no kids and two jobs but one is weekends only and the hours are sporatic. Essentially, my time and money is all my own. What I realized in my ephiany is that my problem isn't with time itself but with priorities. When I say "I don't have time" what I really should be saying is "I don't want to make time". I have time to excersise but rather be online. I have time to volunteer but rather be at the beach. For me it isn't about finding the time, but choosing how to fill the abundance of time I have.

Some of you reading this today are probably thinking "ah ha! That's why I don't hear from her" or "Sheesh...that's why she flaked on me last weekend". Absolutely! It's because I may have not made the best choice in how to fill time. This is why I am using this public forum to declare my attempt to make better choices starting with time verses priority. There are volunteer opportunities and chances to reconnect with those I love that I am missing out on. I just hope TiVo will remember me when I come back to reconnect with him (Yes....my TiVo is a him....so was Samantha's on "Sex And The City"....my name is Cyndie and I am a TV Addict..but that's another blog for later).

I may be blessed with time but we are all blessed with having free will and the ability to choose. How will you choose to spend your time today? I am going to the gym....right after I finish last weeks "24"! What can I say, change is a work in progress!

:)

A Mother's Day Gift

This year I gave a gift that is as much of a gift to my mother as it is to myself. It didn't cost a dime and didn't have to be shipped. It is practical and will last forever. It is the perfect gift.

I thought about this gift a short while ago while thinking about accountablity. More often than not, adults have things in the past that they blame for the crap going on in the present. Some pain is physical, some mental. I am not denying that pain of any variety inflicted during childhood is a bitch to get over and I am sure is the cause of a lot of the addictions people deal with. There are two ways to deal with pain, healthy and not and most often, the not healthy way is what we turn to.

With that all said, I believe that there comes a time in adulthood when you just have to stop blaiming your past for what is happening in your future. Deal with the crap and move on. You have to! I'm not recommending not visiting the past, just to make it a short trip. Find out the reasons that you are doing what you are doing and use that information to move past it!

This isn't easy, believe me! I have used food for the better part of my life to shove down feelings about things in my past. But at 44 years old it is time to learn from those things and use that knowledge to live a better life in the next 44 years. So I am using today as a jumping off point to leave the past in the past and its starts with Mom. Here goes:

Mom,

My gift to you: forgiveness. I know you did the best you could after dad left and I love you for it! Are there things I would change if I could go back and do it over? Of course. But the past is the past. I am happy that you are now asking me to come over and that we can have a converstion without killing each other. I am grateful for the gifts you gave me growing up such as your independence, intelligence and sense of humor. I appreciate the sacrifices you made raising 3 small kids on your own and I know it wasn't easy for either one of us. But love manifests itself in many ways and while ours isn't the Hallmark gooey kind, sacrifice is definately love and you gave us that for sure. Mom, time has given me the wisdom to see that that raising me wasn't easy but hopefully you look at me and are proud of the adult I have become. You are the reason, for better and for worse that I am who I am and I am grateful! I love you.

Happy Mother's Day!
Cynthia

A Mother's Day Gift

This year I gave a gift that is as much of a gift to my mother as it is to myself. It didn't cost a dime and didn't have to be shipped. It is practical and will last forever. It is the perfect gift.

I thought about this gift a short while ago while thinking about accountablity. More often than not, adults have things in the past that they blame for the crap going on in the present. Some pain is physical, some mental. I am not denying that pain of any variety inflicted during childhood is a bitch to get over and I am sure is the cause of a lot of the addictions people deal with. There are two ways to deal with pain, healthy and not and most often, the not healthy way is what we turn to.

With that all said, I believe that there comes a time in adulthood when you just have to stop blaiming your past for what is happening in your future. Deal with the crap and move on. You have to! I'm not recommending not visiting the past, just to make it a short trip. Find out the reasons that you are doing what you are doing and use that information to move past it!

This isn't easy, believe me! I have used food for the better part of my life to shove down feelings about things in my past. But at 44 years old it is time to learn from those things and use that knowledge to live a better life in the next 44 years. So I am using today as a jumping off point to leave the past in the past and its starts with Mom. Here goes:

Mom,

My gift to you: forgiveness. I know you did the best you could after dad left and I love you for it! Are there things I would change if I could go back and do it over? Of course. But the past is the past. I am happy that you are now asking me to come over and that we can have a converstion without killing each other. I am grateful for the gifts you gave me growing up such as your independence, intelligence and sense of humor. I appreciate the sacrifices you made raising 3 small kids on your own and I know it wasn't easy for either one of us. But love manifests itself in many ways and while ours isn't the Hallmark gooey kind, sacrifice is definately love and you gave us that for sure. Mom, time has given me the wisdom to see that that raising me wasn't easy but hopefully you look at me and are proud of the adult I have become. You are the reason, for better and for worse that I am who I am and I am grateful! I love you.

Happy Mother's Day!
Cynthia

Flip Flop Weekend

I love flip flops! Maybe its in my born in So Cal genes. Flip Flops symbolize the casual, carefree atmosphere we are known for here in L.A. To me, they also symbolize the more restrictive part of my life: the workplace. I think this is because I can't wear flips at work, no matter who designed them or how much they cost. $65 rhinestone adorned Havaiana's? Nope! Definately not the $5 Old Navy ones. So much in life is buttoned up, why shouldn't we let our feet hang loose?


I thought about this as stood looking at the schedule of my part-time job. There it was: Sunday 7 AM-Noon. Damn! Not happy! A weekend with a commitment...again! Not a flip-flop weekend! The devil on one shoulder says I can call in, the angel on the other reminds me of those human and animal beings depending on me to be there!


It was with all this in mind that I welcomed an unexpected turn of events. As I stood there wondering which shoulder would win the war of my conscience, my co-worker walks in. She asks if want to give up my shift this weekend so she would be able to make he car payment. I didn't hesitate before I said "absolutely"!Break out those Havaianas and lets go...anywhere but work!


Let me take a moment to clarify that I am grateful to have not only a full-time job but also a part time one. Very grateful, in fact, to have more than one job when so many are struggling to find work in this economic downturn. This blessing isn't lost on me! But I welcome a weekend with no commitments of any kind, be it friends, volunteering or work. I am craving a fly by the seat of your pants weekend where anything goes and my feet are free in flips.


This is a switch from how I used to view weekends. I would panic when faced with a weekend with nothing on the schedule. Boredom is second on my list of worst enemies, second only to loneliness. To avoid both of them I would pack my weekends with all kinds of stuff. Anything to keep me away from myself and those voices that say that only losers are alone. Anything to keep me from stuffing those feelings down with food.


How did I get from viewing alone time as something worse than the plague to viewing it as bliss? Well, somewhere along this journey we call life, I discovered that I enjoy spending time with someone who is funny, smart and in touch with the world they are living in. Much to my surprize, that person is me! Alone time lets me take a step out of the world and take stock of what is going on, what needs revision and what needs to be worked on! It is a necessary respite from life in the crazy big city!


As I awoke this morning the sun was shining, the birds singing, the smell of spring flowers in the air! I got dressed and slipped into my flip-flops, eager to get the day started, a day where the only commitment I have is to myself. A great day indeed!


Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

Flip Flop Weekend

I love flip flops! Maybe its in my born in So Cal genes. Flip Flops symbolize the casual, carefree atmosphere we are known for here in L.A. To me, they also symbolize the more restrictive part of my life: the workplace. I think this is because I can't wear flips at work, no matter who designed them or how much they cost. $65 rhinestone adorned Havaiana's? Nope! Definately not the $5 Old Navy ones. So much in life is buttoned up, why shouldn't we let our feet hang loose?


I thought about this as stood looking at the schedule of my part-time job. There it was: Sunday 7 AM-Noon. Damn! Not happy! A weekend with a commitment...again! Not a flip-flop weekend! The devil on one shoulder says I can call in, the angel on the other reminds me of those human and animal beings depending on me to be there!


It was with all this in mind that I welcomed an unexpected turn of events. As I stood there wondering which shoulder would win the war of my conscience, my co-worker walks in. She asks if want to give up my shift this weekend so she would be able to make he car payment. I didn't hesitate before I said "absolutely"!Break out those Havaianas and lets go...anywhere but work!


Let me take a moment to clarify that I am grateful to have not only a full-time job but also a part time one. Very grateful, in fact, to have more than one job when so many are struggling to find work in this economic downturn. This blessing isn't lost on me! But I welcome a weekend with no commitments of any kind, be it friends, volunteering or work. I am craving a fly by the seat of your pants weekend where anything goes and my feet are free in flips.


This is a switch from how I used to view weekends. I would panic when faced with a weekend with nothing on the schedule. Boredom is second on my list of worst enemies, second only to loneliness. To avoid both of them I would pack my weekends with all kinds of stuff. Anything to keep me away from myself and those voices that say that only losers are alone. Anything to keep me from stuffing those feelings down with food.


How did I get from viewing alone time as something worse than the plague to viewing it as bliss? Well, somewhere along this journey we call life, I discovered that I enjoy spending time with someone who is funny, smart and in touch with the world they are living in. Much to my surprize, that person is me! Alone time lets me take a step out of the world and take stock of what is going on, what needs revision and what needs to be worked on! It is a necessary respite from life in the crazy big city!


As I awoke this morning the sun was shining, the birds singing, the smell of spring flowers in the air! I got dressed and slipped into my flip-flops, eager to get the day started, a day where the only commitment I have is to myself. A great day indeed!


Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

The Right To Bare Arms!

There are many things that I don't have in common with Michelle Obama. One, she is married to this guy, a hottie who happens to be the most powerful guy one earth and the one we are looking towards to save us from ruin:



Me? I am desperate and dateless. Just starting to entertain the idea that there might be someone on earth that can put up with me.

Michelle lives here with a fully staffed kitchen, bowling alley, movie theater AND chocolate shop:



I live in a very nice suburb of LA with my three roommates, one with two legs and two with four paws! We are comfortable in our two-story 3 bedroom house but it doesnt have a chocolate shop (no...PMS weeks in bed with Reeses don't count).

Michelle and I differ in many ways and are a like in many others.But where we stand in solidariy is in our love of sleeveless clothes! All the cute styles are sleevless, some even strapless! Cute tops and dresses that are chic and even cool both in the temperature sense and in the mojo sense. Florals, boho, paisley...it seems everything cute is sleeveless.

It sucks because Michelle works hard at getting the amazing arms that have made more headlines than her husbands stimulus bill! She is at the gym before the crack dawn to work out. Me? I am probably just going to bed after staying up IM'ing with Selena!

Like most things worth having, cut arms like hers take work, work I am not yet willing to do. Yesterday I stood at the store staring at the cute black and pink sleeveless dress and it dawned on me that I was faced with a choice: either work at getting my arms into the shape they should be or throw embarassment to the wind, not give a rip and wear the dress bare arms and all! I am leaning toward the later but until I am sure, I am going to continue the quest to find the perfect cute dress...with sleeves!

The Right To Bare Arms!

There are many things that I don't have in common with Michelle Obama. One, she is married to this guy, a hottie who happens to be the most powerful guy one earth and the one we are looking towards to save us from ruin:



Me? I am desperate and dateless. Just starting to entertain the idea that there might be someone on earth that can put up with me.

Michelle lives here with a fully staffed kitchen, bowling alley, movie theater AND chocolate shop:



I live in a very nice suburb of LA with my three roommates, one with two legs and two with four paws! We are comfortable in our two-story 3 bedroom house but it doesnt have a chocolate shop (no...PMS weeks in bed with Reeses don't count).

Michelle and I differ in many ways and are a like in many others.But where we stand in solidariy is in our love of sleeveless clothes! All the cute styles are sleevless, some even strapless! Cute tops and dresses that are chic and even cool both in the temperature sense and in the mojo sense. Florals, boho, paisley...it seems everything cute is sleeveless.

It sucks because Michelle works hard at getting the amazing arms that have made more headlines than her husbands stimulus bill! She is at the gym before the crack dawn to work out. Me? I am probably just going to bed after staying up IM'ing with Selena!

Like most things worth having, cut arms like hers take work, work I am not yet willing to do. Yesterday I stood at the store staring at the cute black and pink sleeveless dress and it dawned on me that I was faced with a choice: either work at getting my arms into the shape they should be or throw embarassment to the wind, not give a rip and wear the dress bare arms and all! I am leaning toward the later but until I am sure, I am going to continue the quest to find the perfect cute dress...with sleeves!

CHECK IT OUT!!!

It was bound to happen sooner or later. Me...LA native and obsessed with all things celeb....in a paprazzi shot! Check it out: to the left, light blue, looking dorky:




If you click on the pic, you can really see me to the left. I am glad I was dressed for the press...ok, actually dressed for work but whatever! The whole scene was cracking me up as you can tell. Ok...truth be told.."John....wait for me..." That was what I was saying ....LOL

CHECK IT OUT!!!

It was bound to happen sooner or later. Me...LA native and obsessed with all things celeb....in a paprazzi shot! Check it out: to the left, light blue, looking dorky:




If you click on the pic, you can really see me to the left. I am glad I was dressed for the press...ok, actually dressed for work but whatever! The whole scene was cracking me up as you can tell. Ok...truth be told.."John....wait for me..." That was what I was saying ....LOL

Party Like A Rock Star...Sort Of!

I was waiting for the tweet to come. I knew it would eventually. As past performance is a good indicator for the future, I just knew he would eventually do this. The communication vessel used to be MySpace but that was a couple of years ago. Twitter is the new and immediate way to communicate. And so there it was at 9:55: "I'm hitting up the Hotel Cafe around 11". Who was the tweeter? John Mayer! The event: a club gig at the Hotel Cafe! The reason: to try out the new material he is working on before it is committed to vynal.

This posed a dilema. A dilema, you ask? What delema? John Mayer....Hollywood...tiny club...20 mins away....where is the dilema? Seeing John's hot self in a local club sounds great had I not been AT WORK!! He is tweeting about clubbing at 11 and I work until midnight! ARRGH! However, when I stepped back and thought about it I reminded myself of one true and constant fact: musicians work on their own unique time frame. So if he is tweeting about playing around 11, in rocker time that means around midnight! Will he still be playing when I get there? Will I be able to get in? Am I too old to even think about clubbing on a weeknight, even if it is for the hot, boytoy rocker?

I pondered those questions while hauling ass down the freeway at about 80, eyes constantly moving and scanning for those fine men in blue! I got the answers to the questions after I arrived the club at about 12:20. Yes, he would be playing for about another 10 minutes but no, I wouldn't be able to get in! DAMN!!! As I was pondering my next question, should I stay or should I go, I was blinded by flashbulbs suddenly going off and looked up in time to see John walk by me and towards his car that was parked nearby. In my mind he winked at me, but in reality it was mostly likely because of the 15 or so paprazzi flashes going off in his face! How do celebs manage? That is crazy!! In fact if this pic was a few inches to the left, I would be in it looking like Bambi in headlights:




So I head home, lighter in the wallet because of parking and a few gallons shorter on gas. But no regrets! I am glad to see this ole gal of 43 can still party on a work night...or at least make the attempt!

Party Like A Rock Star...Sort Of!

I was waiting for the tweet to come. I knew it would eventually. As past performance is a good indicator for the future, I just knew he would eventually do this. The communication vessel used to be MySpace but that was a couple of years ago. Twitter is the new and immediate way to communicate. And so there it was at 9:55: "I'm hitting up the Hotel Cafe around 11". Who was the tweeter? John Mayer! The event: a club gig at the Hotel Cafe! The reason: to try out the new material he is working on before it is committed to vynal.

This posed a dilema. A dilema, you ask? What delema? John Mayer....Hollywood...tiny club...20 mins away....where is the dilema? Seeing John's hot self in a local club sounds great had I not been AT WORK!! He is tweeting about clubbing at 11 and I work until midnight! ARRGH! However, when I stepped back and thought about it I reminded myself of one true and constant fact: musicians work on their own unique time frame. So if he is tweeting about playing around 11, in rocker time that means around midnight! Will he still be playing when I get there? Will I be able to get in? Am I too old to even think about clubbing on a weeknight, even if it is for the hot, boytoy rocker?

I pondered those questions while hauling ass down the freeway at about 80, eyes constantly moving and scanning for those fine men in blue! I got the answers to the questions after I arrived the club at about 12:20. Yes, he would be playing for about another 10 minutes but no, I wouldn't be able to get in! DAMN!!! As I was pondering my next question, should I stay or should I go, I was blinded by flashbulbs suddenly going off and looked up in time to see John walk by me and towards his car that was parked nearby. In my mind he winked at me, but in reality it was mostly likely because of the 15 or so paprazzi flashes going off in his face! How do celebs manage? That is crazy!! In fact if this pic was a few inches to the left, I would be in it looking like Bambi in headlights:




So I head home, lighter in the wallet because of parking and a few gallons shorter on gas. But no regrets! I am glad to see this ole gal of 43 can still party on a work night...or at least make the attempt!

Mommy Issues

Daniel Faraday got shot by his...Bristol Palin was pimped for political gain by hers...mothers!

The World Isn't Perfect

The phone call comes in like many others before it. Its my job to answer that phone and help people with their questions about their medical plans. The display on my phone says "Ticketmaster", which is the entity that pays for the plan, the members employer. In a perfect world, the call would have gone like this:

Me: May I help you?
Him: Yes, I need a list of doctors that are on the plan
Me: Ok, will that be on a major credit card....or on a major credit card?
Him: What?
Me: We only take credit cards so what will it be?
Him: Credit cards for what?
Me: The ridiculous fees it cost to get your information
Him: Are you kidding, I have nowhere else to get this information?
Me: Exactly! That's why we screw you with fees! Now about that info? It will be $25
Him: That's a third of what I pay for the insurance itself
Me: Do you want the information or not? It's $10 for me to look it up,
$10 for me to send it to you and $5 for the pleasure of doing business with us
Him: I have no choice
Me: Have a nice day

In a perfect world where turnabout is fair play, I could have taken that guy to the cleaners just as Ticketmaster does to every event going person in America. They are essentially the only ticket selling entity that exists and they charge whatever they want, sometimes close to doubling the price of a ticket! Wouldn't it be great if we all could be opportunistic bastards? No....not really!

In a perfect world businesses would not only exist to make money but to help others as well. Money would be a by product of doing the right thing.

In a perfect world this would happen. But this world isn't perfect. Hope is the new black these days so maybe in the future prices to see those old geezers U2 won't be priced in the stratosphere.

One can hope!

The World Isn't Perfect

The phone call comes in like many others before it. Its my job to answer that phone and help people with their questions about their medical plans. The display on my phone says "Ticketmaster", which is the entity that pays for the plan, the members employer. In a perfect world, the call would have gone like this:

Me: May I help you?
Him: Yes, I need a list of doctors that are on the plan
Me: Ok, will that be on a major credit card....or on a major credit card?
Him: What?
Me: We only take credit cards so what will it be?
Him: Credit cards for what?
Me: The ridiculous fees it cost to get your information
Him: Are you kidding, I have nowhere else to get this information?
Me: Exactly! That's why we screw you with fees! Now about that info? It will be $25
Him: That's a third of what I pay for the insurance itself
Me: Do you want the information or not? It's $10 for me to look it up,
$10 for me to send it to you and $5 for the pleasure of doing business with us
Him: I have no choice
Me: Have a nice day

In a perfect world where turnabout is fair play, I could have taken that guy to the cleaners just as Ticketmaster does to every event going person in America. They are essentially the only ticket selling entity that exists and they charge whatever they want, sometimes close to doubling the price of a ticket! Wouldn't it be great if we all could be opportunistic bastards? No....not really!

In a perfect world businesses would not only exist to make money but to help others as well. Money would be a by product of doing the right thing.

In a perfect world this would happen. But this world isn't perfect. Hope is the new black these days so maybe in the future prices to see those old geezers U2 won't be priced in the stratosphere.

One can hope!

In a perfect world the call would have gone like this:



Me: Thank you for calling large insurance company, this is Cynthia may I help you?

Caller: Yes, I work for Ticketmaster and want to find a doctor that is on the plan?

Me: I can help you with that. Lets see....ah yes....I see we have several doctors on the plan in your area.

Caller: Great! How do I get that information?

Me: Well, you can put it on a major credit card or.....wait....you can ONLY put it on a major credit card as there is no other way to pay for the info.

Caller: PAY for the info?

Me: That is right. There is the charge for the info, plus a third of that cost is my locator fee and then there is another fee for mailing the info and a fee for finding an envelope and and a fee folding the list and putting it into the envelope....

Caller: Forget this...I am going to another insurance company

Me: Well, you employer only offers us for your health care needs so unfortunately we are the only game in town. Now....about payment?



Ok...you get the gist!

Bliss and Gratitude

The Bliss List:

1) A New TV Season-So much promise and joy in the belief that Josh Schwartz, Arron Sorkin and JJ Abrams will save us from the sloth that is reality TV...and Jack Bauer will save us from other worldly evils not quite as terrible as American Idol.

2) My Dogs-Through them I have learned the joy of unconditional love, that I spoil those I love too much, and that great comedy doesn't have to come from humans, it can come from two dogs and a spilled plate of cheetos at midnight while the rest of the house is asleep!

3) Summer-Warm temps and longer days hold the promise that great things are about to happen

4) Thursdays-New magazine day at the best newstand in the Valley. Pure bliss is the new People, Entertainment Weekly and US Magazine! Shout out to my peeps at What's News in Woodland Hills.

5) Ameoba Music-Sheer Heaven on earth for any music fan! One of the few remaining independent music stores in America! CD's (both new and used), Vynal and a floor upstairs devoted to VHS and DVD! They even host live shows for new and established artists for free! Paul McCartney did a show there! I walk in the door and a smile goes on the face! Only go there IF you have money to spend because trust me, you WILL spend it! Haven't spent less than $50 on any given trip!

Daily Gratitude:

Flip Flops and the weather to wear them in
Job with good benefits and nice co-workers
A part-time job working with dogs
Technology and the "toys" that allow me to take the internet with me wherever I go.
Friends I love
TiVo
Trader Joes

Bliss and Gratitude

The Bliss List:

1) A New TV Season-So much promise and joy in the belief that Josh Schwartz, Arron Sorkin and JJ Abrams will save us from the sloth that is reality TV...and Jack Bauer will save us from other worldly evils not quite as terrible as American Idol.

2) My Dogs-Through them I have learned the joy of unconditional love, that I spoil those I love too much, and that great comedy doesn't have to come from humans, it can come from two dogs and a spilled plate of cheetos at midnight while the rest of the house is asleep!

3) Summer-Warm temps and longer days hold the promise that great things are about to happen

4) Thursdays-New magazine day at the best newstand in the Valley. Pure bliss is the new People, Entertainment Weekly and US Magazine! Shout out to my peeps at What's News in Woodland Hills.

5) Ameoba Music-Sheer Heaven on earth for any music fan! One of the few remaining independent music stores in America! CD's (both new and used), Vynal and a floor upstairs devoted to VHS and DVD! They even host live shows for new and established artists for free! Paul McCartney did a show there! I walk in the door and a smile goes on the face! Only go there IF you have money to spend because trust me, you WILL spend it! Haven't spent less than $50 on any given trip!

Daily Gratitude:

Flip Flops and the weather to wear them in
Job with good benefits and nice co-workers
A part-time job working with dogs
Technology and the "toys" that allow me to take the internet with me wherever I go.
Friends I love
TiVo
Trader Joes

DON'T Call Jenny!

Hate is a strong word but I can truly say I HATE them! They are misleading and manipulative and when you make a pact with this devil, it can be expensive! What am I referring to? Jenny Craig, her crappy food and manipulative commercials!

I have a personal reason to be frustrated: not only do I have a lifelong struggle with my weight, but against the advice of my own inner voice and all my friends, I spent three weeks and close to $600 on Jenny Craig! I didn't lose anything but money and lots of it! I hated the food, didn't like the 5 minute "support" and resented paying lots of money while the food sat in the freezer because I didn't like it! Some of it is still in there!

Kirsty Alley was on Oprah this week speaking of her struggle with weight. She tried Jenny but the minute the guys with the scale and a copy of her contract quit coming to her house, she gained the weight back! Sure it must be easier to stay on that diet when you are getting paid but the real reason she quit was most likely that she didn't have her head in the game.

On the same show, Oprah spoke with the guy who weight over a thousand pounds, lost 800, gained it back and is now in the process of losing it again. When asked why he hadn't tried gastric bypass he said it was because they couldn't do a bypass for his brain. Hunger is rarely a factor when he eats.

I see a pattern here and it's one I believe to be true, especially for myself: the biggest struggle with weight loss is going to be the battle that is waged in your head, not the one between you and the fridge. If you aren't dealing with the reasons why you eat why you do, the ones that don't involve "addiction to chocolate" or eating at "that time of the month", than the weight won't come off or stay off.

That is what I most resent about Jenny. She isn't truthful about what it takes to get the weight off. Sure, we all look at Valerie Bertinelli's AMAZING 48 year old new body and think all we have to do is eat that expensive box/frozen food to get it. What they don't tell you in the ads is that Valerie spent hours in the gym to get it! I just hope she is doing the head work as well to keep it off! The odds aren't in her favor!

The odds aren't in my favor, either! I had the full gastric bypass surgery 3 years ago after topping off at 347 pounds. The weight came off as quick as the compliments started coming in. Before I knew it I was down 110 pounds. Yeah...I am fitting in a airline seat, shopping at Old Navy, loving hearing how people tell me I look good. None of that solved the real reason I kept the weight on in the first place: my fear of intimacy with men. Oddly enough, when I came to that "ah ha moment" was when my weight loss efforts stalled and started to slowly creep back up. My head isn't in the game totally. I feel schitzo...I want to take the weight off so I can get into a relationship but keep the weight on so I don't have to face that fear!! Sheesh...that's not something Jenny is going to help me with!

It is still a major struggle just to keep the weight i've lost off much less lose any more! My total net loss at this point is 95 pounds down but I have gained much more in self-awareness. I am going to continue with Weight Watchers, the safe and supportive way to lose weight and start seeing a therapist. And when I am ready to deal with the real reason why the weight is not coming off, it will come off.

Life is hard, there is no way around it. We all have our ways to deal with the downs, be it alcohol, shopping or food! The key is to find a healthy way to deal with the hand you are dealt and I don't think that the solution is found in boxed food, no matter if its yummy or not!

DON'T Call Jenny!

Hate is a strong word but I can truly say I HATE them! They are misleading and manipulative and when you make a pact with this devil, it can be expensive! What am I referring to? Jenny Craig, her crappy food and manipulative commercials!

I have a personal reason to be frustrated: not only do I have a lifelong struggle with my weight, but against the advice of my own inner voice and all my friends, I spent three weeks and close to $600 on Jenny Craig! I didn't lose anything but money and lots of it! I hated the food, didn't like the 5 minute "support" and resented paying lots of money while the food sat in the freezer because I didn't like it! Some of it is still in there!

Kirsty Alley was on Oprah this week speaking of her struggle with weight. She tried Jenny but the minute the guys with the scale and a copy of her contract quit coming to her house, she gained the weight back! Sure it must be easier to stay on that diet when you are getting paid but the real reason she quit was most likely that she didn't have her head in the game.

On the same show, Oprah spoke with the guy who weight over a thousand pounds, lost 800, gained it back and is now in the process of losing it again. When asked why he hadn't tried gastric bypass he said it was because they couldn't do a bypass for his brain. Hunger is rarely a factor when he eats.

I see a pattern here and it's one I believe to be true, especially for myself: the biggest struggle with weight loss is going to be the battle that is waged in your head, not the one between you and the fridge. If you aren't dealing with the reasons why you eat why you do, the ones that don't involve "addiction to chocolate" or eating at "that time of the month", than the weight won't come off or stay off.

That is what I most resent about Jenny. She isn't truthful about what it takes to get the weight off. Sure, we all look at Valerie Bertinelli's AMAZING 48 year old new body and think all we have to do is eat that expensive box/frozen food to get it. What they don't tell you in the ads is that Valerie spent hours in the gym to get it! I just hope she is doing the head work as well to keep it off! The odds aren't in her favor!

The odds aren't in my favor, either! I had the full gastric bypass surgery 3 years ago after topping off at 347 pounds. The weight came off as quick as the compliments started coming in. Before I knew it I was down 110 pounds. Yeah...I am fitting in a airline seat, shopping at Old Navy, loving hearing how people tell me I look good. None of that solved the real reason I kept the weight on in the first place: my fear of intimacy with men. Oddly enough, when I came to that "ah ha moment" was when my weight loss efforts stalled and started to slowly creep back up. My head isn't in the game totally. I feel schitzo...I want to take the weight off so I can get into a relationship but keep the weight on so I don't have to face that fear!! Sheesh...that's not something Jenny is going to help me with!

It is still a major struggle just to keep the weight i've lost off much less lose any more! My total net loss at this point is 95 pounds down but I have gained much more in self-awareness. I am going to continue with Weight Watchers, the safe and supportive way to lose weight and start seeing a therapist. And when I am ready to deal with the real reason why the weight is not coming off, it will come off.

Life is hard, there is no way around it. We all have our ways to deal with the downs, be it alcohol, shopping or food! The key is to find a healthy way to deal with the hand you are dealt and I don't think that the solution is found in boxed food, no matter if its yummy or not!

I Love LA!!

I have been searching for a background for my blog for a week or so. I wanted something that said something about me. I tried argyle print....too girly. Paw prints spoke to my love of dogs but that is only a small part of who I am. Then today I finally found the background that I feel speaks to exactly who I am.

The picture in the background of my blog is not a picture of any city. It is a place where dreams are made, where the sun shines aproximately 360 days a year, where you can ski in the morning and surf at night. It is the heart of the entertainment industry and the heart of the automobile culture. It is the center of pop culture.

I am a rare breed, the native Angeleno. I am, in fact, an original "Valley Girl". Its true and a fact I am proud of! However, Angelenos are up against the LA stereotype. When you tell people you are from LA they immediately get a read on who you are: Superficial, flakey, rich, blond! People from other places use what they see in entertainment as a reference as to what Angelenos must be like. I got news for you. We aren't anymore like the kids on "90210" than all New Yorkers are like their counterparts on "Gossip Girl". We aren't all blond, rich and thin and all New Yorkers don't live on the Upper Westside and send emails about their "frienamies" to a gossip website. Imagine me, a overweight, short brunette driving a 15 year old Ford being a LA native! I told you, here in LA anything is possible!

LA is a place like no other place on earth. The great weather lends to good moods, the entertainment industry lends to the belif that anything can happen. The diversity leads to hope for a better world. Sure we have our crosses to bear for living in paradise: traffic is a bitch as is not being able to get anywhere in less than an hour. But when you live in a place millions dream of living in, it's a small price to pay!

La La Land...City of Angels...The Southland...LA...Los Angeles. The place in the background of this blog is known by many names. The name I like best is home. LA is more than just a place to live or even a place to be from. It is one of those rare places that sneaks in and becomes part of the fiber of your being. I won't live anywhere else. Why would I would I when I live in Paradise?

I Love LA!!

I have been searching for a background for my blog for a week or so. I wanted something that said something about me. I tried argyle print....too girly. Paw prints spoke to my love of dogs but that is only a small part of who I am. Then today I finally found the background that I feel speaks to exactly who I am.

The picture in the background of my blog is not a picture of any city. It is a place where dreams are made, where the sun shines aproximately 360 days a year, where you can ski in the morning and surf at night. It is the heart of the entertainment industry and the heart of the automobile culture. It is the center of pop culture.

I am a rare breed, the native Angeleno. I am, in fact, an original "Valley Girl". Its true and a fact I am proud of! However, Angelenos are up against the LA stereotype. When you tell people you are from LA they immediately get a read on who you are: Superficial, flakey, rich, blond! People from other places use what they see in entertainment as a reference as to what Angelenos must be like. I got news for you. We aren't anymore like the kids on "90210" than all New Yorkers are like their counterparts on "Gossip Girl". We aren't all blond, rich and thin and all New Yorkers don't live on the Upper Westside and send emails about their "frienamies" to a gossip website. Imagine me, a overweight, short brunette driving a 15 year old Ford being a LA native! I told you, here in LA anything is possible!

LA is a place like no other place on earth. The great weather lends to good moods, the entertainment industry lends to the belif that anything can happen. The diversity leads to hope for a better world. Sure we have our crosses to bear for living in paradise: traffic is a bitch as is not being able to get anywhere in less than an hour. But when you live in a place millions dream of living in, it's a small price to pay!

La La Land...City of Angels...The Southland...LA...Los Angeles. The place in the background of this blog is known by many names. The name I like best is home. LA is more than just a place to live or even a place to be from. It is one of those rare places that sneaks in and becomes part of the fiber of your being. I won't live anywhere else. Why would I would I when I live in Paradise?

In Repair

I am at the laundry for the first time in 8 years because the dryer is broken. While sitting there watching my underwear going around it occurred to me that the dryer isn't the first or last thing in our house in need of repair.

Its funny...when I moved in 8 years ago, I was the one in need of repair. My family had left for Arizona and didn't want me to go. At 345 pounds I was a physical and emotional wreck. I was a broken down human being.

Enter Val, the human repair woman. A human with a bigger heart is hard to find. I moved in with her and others in need of repair: son-in-law, daughter, 3 grand kids and two 4-month old Rottweiler puppies. We became the extended family we all needed.

The puppies and I flourished and became life long pals. Through gastric by-pass I lost 100 pounds, through our giving into their sweet faces and begging eyes, the puppies grew and ultimately found a 100 pounds. Nothing grew as fast as our bond as I came to love them like I never knew I could love!

Its unconditional love that healed this broken human, love from both Val and the puppies. Unfortunately, some things can't be fixed and the son-in law became an ex and everyone moved on and out. I stayed. Val, Beanie, Thor and I became a family with all the ups and downs that come with that title.

We are now in a down period. Val and I argue more and I am wondering if she is in need of the love repair she so freely gives everyone else. My first response is to say F-off but I think I am going to surround her with the love she surrounded me with 8 years ago and continues to surround me with today. She is dealing with a friend with cancer and family members in various states of crisis. Its my turn to be the repair woman for her.

When I first started this post I was pondering if a move is in order but I now know that is the last thing I want. I want my friend Val to know I love her and will be here for her. She deserves that and more.

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In Repair

I am at the laundry for the first time in 8 years because the dryer is broken. While sitting there watching my underwear going around it occurred to me that the dryer isn't the first or last thing in our house in need of repair.

Its funny...when I moved in 8 years ago, I was the one in need of repair. My family had left for Arizona and didn't want me to go. At 345 pounds I was a physical and emotional wreck. I was a broken down human being.

Enter Val, the human repair woman. A human with a bigger heart is hard to find. I moved in with her and others in need of repair: son-in-law, daughter, 3 grand kids and two 4-month old Rottweiler puppies. We became the extended family we all needed.

The puppies and I flourished and became life long pals. Through gastric by-pass I lost 100 pounds, through our giving into their sweet faces and begging eyes, the puppies grew and ultimately found a 100 pounds. Nothing grew as fast as our bond as I came to love them like I never knew I could love!

Its unconditional love that healed this broken human, love from both Val and the puppies. Unfortunately, some things can't be fixed and the son-in law became an ex and everyone moved on and out. I stayed. Val, Beanie, Thor and I became a family with all the ups and downs that come with that title.

We are now in a down period. Val and I argue more and I am wondering if she is in need of the love repair she so freely gives everyone else. My first response is to say F-off but I think I am going to surround her with the love she surrounded me with 8 years ago and continues to surround me with today. She is dealing with a friend with cancer and family members in various states of crisis. Its my turn to be the repair woman for her.

When I first started this post I was pondering if a move is in order but I now know that is the last thing I want. I want my friend Val to know I love her and will be here for her. She deserves that and more.

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The Blog-Off Begins! :)

Wahoo...The great blog-off begins! I am excited to see what the month brings and also encourage everyone to read my fellow bloggers blog: Oh, My Aches And Pains! Selena is a great friend, fellow pet parent and excellent writer!

Selena is my hero in that she rescued both her dogs….well, technically she rescued Brunswick, the poodle and he rescued Theo, the terrier. Or as Selena calls him the “terrorer”. Theo is still a puppy and is in the fun chewing stage! You should see the pic of my nephew Brunswick on her blog....so cute! She is such a good pet parent! Her dogs are always on a leash and you should see the tricks they do! Selena is a good pet parent AND trainer!

Selena is a good friend and great writer! Check out her blog too! And keep an eye on this spot for more from me! Stay tuned!

The Blog-Off Begins! :)

Wahoo...The great blog-off begins! I am excited to see what the month brings and also encourage everyone to read my fellow bloggers blog: Oh, My Aches And Pains! Selena is a great friend, fellow pet parent and excellent writer!

Selena is my hero in that she rescued both her dogs….well, technically she rescued Brunswick, the poodle and he rescued Theo, the terrier. Or as Selena calls him the “terrorer”. Theo is still a puppy and is in the fun chewing stage! You should see the pic of my nephew Brunswick on her blog....so cute! She is such a good pet parent! Her dogs are always on a leash and you should see the tricks they do! Selena is a good pet parent AND trainer!

Selena is a good friend and great writer! Check out her blog too! And keep an eye on this spot for more from me! Stay tuned!

SAVE CHUCK!!

I am an avid TV fan. A fan of well-written TV! It can be meant for teens (Gossip Girl), action packed (24), funny (30 Rock) or campy (Ugly Betty). As long as it is well written, I will watch it.

Which brings me to one of the most well written, funny, action packed and heartfelt shows on TV:



Chuck is about an accidental spy living in two worlds, his spy world and his "normal" world. It is also about the inhabitants of both those worlds and what happens when those worlds start to mingle. The cast of crazies is led by the amazing Zachary Levi, who is so good that you expect to walk into your local Best Buy and see him running the "Geek Squad". Zach plays the title character Chuck, who moonlights as a spy while working days at the "Buy More" running the "Nerd Herd". Attempts to disguise the Best Buy goof are thinly veiled at best but they are hilarious!

The spectacular Adam Baldwing and Yvonne Strahovski lead the spy pack and it's Strahovski as the object of Chuck's affection and her sorting between her feelings for him and her job that give this show heart!

Words can't do this show justice and it says a lot when I let "24" sit on my TiVo for a week but rush home to watch "Chuck". If NBC lets this one go, it will be a HUGE mistake! It will seriously make me think about my devotion to broadcast TV and their respect for the viewers. I hope by this time next week, after NBC announces it's fall lineup, I will be breathing a sigh of relief!

SAVE CHUCK!!

I am an avid TV fan. A fan of well-written TV! It can be meant for teens (Gossip Girl), action packed (24), funny (30 Rock) or campy (Ugly Betty). As long as it is well written, I will watch it.

Which brings me to one of the most well written, funny, action packed and heartfelt shows on TV:



Chuck is about an accidental spy living in two worlds, his spy world and his "normal" world. It is also about the inhabitants of both those worlds and what happens when those worlds start to mingle. The cast of crazies is led by the amazing Zachary Levi, who is so good that you expect to walk into your local Best Buy and see him running the "Geek Squad". Zach plays the title character Chuck, who moonlights as a spy while working days at the "Buy More" running the "Nerd Herd". Attempts to disguise the Best Buy goof are thinly veiled at best but they are hilarious!

The spectacular Adam Baldwing and Yvonne Strahovski lead the spy pack and it's Strahovski as the object of Chuck's affection and her sorting between her feelings for him and her job that give this show heart!

Words can't do this show justice and it says a lot when I let "24" sit on my TiVo for a week but rush home to watch "Chuck". If NBC lets this one go, it will be a HUGE mistake! It will seriously make me think about my devotion to broadcast TV and their respect for the viewers. I hope by this time next week, after NBC announces it's fall lineup, I will be breathing a sigh of relief!

My Writer's Assistant

I have an assistant. He is sweet and gives me inspiration for the task at hand. Did I mention that he let's me pick what we watch while writing and ....oh yeah....he is very very handsome. Here is a pic



He is one of my dynamic duo: my Rotties, my loves, my heart! I love this bug bug and his brother more than I thought possible! Thor sits at the foot of the bed while I sit at the top and type. He would rather be watching "animal Planet" but is ok with me watching "Private Practice" on TiVo. Bear is off chasing birds in the backyard and comes in to get his hugs while checking to make sure all is well! I love the two of them and they love me! Life is good!

My Writer's Assistant

I have an assistant. He is sweet and gives me inspiration for the task at hand. Did I mention that he let's me pick what we watch while writing and ....oh yeah....he is very very handsome. Here is a pic



He is one of my dynamic duo: my Rotties, my loves, my heart! I love this bug bug and his brother more than I thought possible! Thor sits at the foot of the bed while I sit at the top and type. He would rather be watching "animal Planet" but is ok with me watching "Private Practice" on TiVo. Bear is off chasing birds in the backyard and comes in to get his hugs while checking to make sure all is well! I love the two of them and they love me! Life is good!

OK...Now I Have To Keep This Up!

I am the queen of procrastination so that is why I put the shout out to my friends on Facebook to follow my blog! I am hoping that will help me to keep my plan of one post a day! One post a day....they say the biggest challenge for writers is finding the discipline to sit and write each day. So, my friends, you are my inspiration and motivation to do just that! Challenge me and hold me accountable if I am not doing what I set out to do. Discipline has never been a strong characteristic of mine!

I am headed to work but will post more when I get home tonight!

Cyn

BTW....hugs and kisses to Selena! She is so excited about my blogging, she followed me twice! LOL

OK...Now I Have To Keep This Up!

I am the queen of procrastination so that is why I put the shout out to my friends on Facebook to follow my blog! I am hoping that will help me to keep my plan of one post a day! One post a day....they say the biggest challenge for writers is finding the discipline to sit and write each day. So, my friends, you are my inspiration and motivation to do just that! Challenge me and hold me accountable if I am not doing what I set out to do. Discipline has never been a strong characteristic of mine!

I am headed to work but will post more when I get home tonight!

Cyn

BTW....hugs and kisses to Selena! She is so excited about my blogging, she followed me twice! LOL

A couple of nights ago, I was engaging in America's new favorite pastime, stalking people on Twitter and something stuck out to me! There is Ali Sweeney of Biggest loser fame, tweeting about how she is going to the Springsteen show. Greg Grunberg of Heroes....going to see The Boss. But the one that really got to me was one John Mayer! Now I am all for my musical heroes enjoy each others work and getting inspiration from each other which is the reason John said he was going to the show! Awesome that he is worshiping at the feet of one of the masters, as John is prone to do! But when it dawned on me that the reason I was home instead of at the show was that I just spent a fortune going on John's cruise to Cabo...well, that just sucks! In the imortal words of my mother, "who said life was going to be fair".



I know...I know...poor baby...whining because she just spent money on a cruise she couldn't afford and now can't afford to go to a concert! Yes....I am well aware of how blessed I am in this economy

Mayercraft-It's An Attitude

The attitude adjustment starts before you even leave. You wake up in the morning and you feel different! The sun is shining, it's a gorgeous day and the weight of the world temporarily feels like it's lifted off your sholders. You aren't going to work, you are headed to the Cabo with John Mayer and 2, 800 music fans! How could you possibly be anything other than hopeful, excited, elated?

Reality Sucks

This time last week I was having lunch on the deck of a cruise ship waiting for John Mayer to take me to Cabo. Today I am spending lunch worried about the stray dog outside of Trader Joes. Abandoned? Backyard escapee? No one is sure. What I do know for sure is reality bites.
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Reality Sucks

This time last week I was having lunch on the deck of a cruise ship waiting for John Mayer to take me to Cabo. Today I am spending lunch worried about the stray dog outside of Trader Joes. Abandoned? Backyard escapee? No one is sure. What I do know for sure is reality bites.
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Recovery From The Mayercraft

Its been 2 days since the boat docked and I am finding it hard to adjust. How do you assimilate back into the 9-5 grind when you have just spent 4 glorious days at sea with some of the friendliest, coolest music fans on the planet?? (2,800 of them to be exact). How do you get over being among the 75 or so people who were lucky enough to catch the comedy stylings of Mr. John Mayer....or lucky enough to be able to say you danced to his dj'ing? How do you get over the joy of basking in the Cali sun on deck as we sailed away while John played an amazing acoustic set with DRH....even debuting a new song??

I am going to try and work through what John Mayer calls "post departum depression" by blogging about the most amazing experience I have ever had the pleasure of paying through the nose for. I have to do something. My dogs are tired of trying to balance trays of fruity drinks on their heads as they walk through my room!
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Greetings From Wonderland Pt. 1

Mayercraft Days 1 and 2

My what an awfully big.......BOAT:



we drink this.....



....to get through this:



The Lido Deck became the "Libido" deck. Ground zero for good times:





Cool breeze, fruity drinks, John Mayer acoustic on the Lido as we sailed out to sea:





Cool thing about a cruise....BATH TOWEL ANIMALS:



Cabo Wabo...where "there is only one way to rock":





The "bathrobe guys"! The gang that put the "party" in "bachelor party":




More to come...stay tuned! :)

New Blog

Ok....so I have been lacking on the blogging...big time!! So.....here it is...I am pledging to clean up the blog....delete partial posts.....and blog daily!! Music is my passion and my first love so most of the posts will be about my adventures as a music fan. However, I may throw in posts on live as a single woman in the big city just to keep it interesting.

I am going to clean up the blog and write until my hearts content from here forward. First up on the new blog...Mayercraft 2!!

More on that later tonight! Of to work so I can afford Mayercraft 3!

XOXO~~~Cyn

Lights Mix It Up At The Sagebrush, Leave Them Happy In Long Beach!

I can only imagine how hard it is for a tribute band to keep it fresh, not get bored with the established songs that the fans of the original band want to hear show after show! Luckily for Lights, the band they pay tribute to, Journey, is still making new music! That presents a different question: do you take on the new music while Journey themselves are out on tour?

Lights took on the challenge Saturday night. In front of a jam packed crowd at the Sagebrush Cantina in Calabassas Saturday Night, the band surprized the crowd by launching into "Never Walk Away", a song off the new Journey CD, Revolution. The song highlights Journey's signature melodic, guitar driven melodies and their harmonies. It is a total throw back to the Journey of the "Escape" era. With Juan Del Castillo's soaring vocals, driving guitar riffs and melodic keyboards from Jonny Papa and Jeff Vincent as well as the amazing rhythm section of Casey McNerney and Michael Thompson keeping the beat, Lights nailed it! Sure....ask any band member and they will be self-critical as musicians are by telling you it sucked but if the looks on the faces in the crowd are any indication, the song should become a set staple soon!

The following night found the band in it's own "city by the bay", Long Beach! Lights are one of Long Beach's favorite bands and Saturday night they treated the crowd to Journey classics such as "Don't Stop Belivin", "Lights" and "Wheel In The Sky". The Blue Cafe was full of Journey fans that danced and screamed for their favorites all night. Juan, Jonny and Jeff did a great job with melodies as those on "I'll Be Alright Without You" and "Anyway You Want It", while Casey and Michael's driving rhythm made "Lovin, Touchin, Squeezin" sound sexier than ever! The band was so appreciative of the crowd and their energy that they even pulled out the seldom played "Mother, Father"!

New Journey, classic Journey...you never know what the guys in Lights will pull out of their hats! Come see for yourself this Friday, August 1 at Harpers Bar and Grill in Northridge. You won't be disappointed. Check out http://www.lightsband.com/ for details!

Lights Turn Up The Heat At Citywalk!

I am not one that usually goes crazy about my birthday. If I want to do something, i'll plan it myself! I've had some great birthdays that way. Destination birthdays like San Diego, Vegas and Catalina have been fun as are the birthdays where I was at a concert. In fact, my first Bon Jovi show was at Irvine Meadows on my 22nd birthday! THAT was a fun one!

This birthday was like that one. The night started out with a circus atmosphere as some crazy Cirque Du Soliel kind of act came out and perfomed some performance art kind of thing. Then my friends in Lights hit the stage. How cool! Well....not literally! It was 110 degrees and humid! The guys were at their energetic best! It would be understandable if the guys used the weather as a reason to coast, maybe play at 50%. Think about it, if we were DYING watching them, under the lights the guys must have been miserably hot! Much to the credit of their professionalism and dedication to their audience, the band didn't back off one bit! Coming onstage after a great introduction by no less than LA music icon Richard Blade, the guys opened up with "Escape"! Despite the heat, the song got the crowd up and dancing and they stayed that way for most of the two hour show! Playing outside on a stage in front of the Hard Rock couldn't have been easy in the heat but despite the temps, the band made sure the night was a party! The crowd loved them and stuck around in the heat to hear favorites like "Be Good To Yourself" and "Lights". Front man Juan Del Castillo and guitarist Jonny Papa kept the crowd entertained while Casey McNerney and Michael Thompson kept them rockin! Keyboardist Jeff Vincent got in on the action as well, sharing vocals with Juan on "That's The Same Way"! As usual, a great job was done by all!

From dinner with friends at the Hard Rock to a great show by a great band! This was a birthday to remember! What a way to kick off summer!

:)